tell me

sigh... tell me about the crying part girl. i still do it at times. the tears just comes when i'm about to go to bed eventhough my day went well. negative thoughts and insecurities starts drowning all over me. heebies-jeebies! this what happens when you act cool and carefree all the time. no matter what, you can never put on a facade for too long. carefree mode is good but has it's cons too. maybe i'm running away from the situation? maybe it's just my imagination of happiness? maybe i'm just being paranoid? i really don't know. this what happens when there's no trust. you get heebies-jeebies and see red easily then blow up then lose your mood. when it's time to get out of my room, i wear my happy facade and act as if i'm so normal around my parents. i do this so often till i don't even know what the hell i'm doing. it's like it's a daily routine. i'm sorry if i find it hard to believe your words even though you might be telling the truth. i'm sorry if i offended some of you out there with my thoughts/straight forward comments. i don't have guts to sound ppl or share my real thoughts actually so if you do get one from me, consider yrself lucky.